"You want a discount?" Rico Suave asked this afternoon, eyeing me up and down from behind the counter at Sport Chalet.
I assumed he was going to try to sell me on a store credit card. "These are already on sale, I don't need one," I politely declined.
"You a real blond?" he said. Which, now that I type it, makes me think he was being dirty and wondering if the carpet matched the drapes...if ya know what I'm sayin'...
"Yes," I answered. "It's darker than it was when I was a kid, so I highlight it. But it's real."
He looked to be Middle Eastern, with dark, curly hair and a tiny moustache and trimmed beard. "You a real brunette?" I shot back at him.
"Black, you mean, not brunette," he corrected me.
What do you call someone with black hair? Yellow hair is blond, brown hair is brunette, red heads are...well, red heads—does that mean I have to call someone a black head if they have charcoal hair? That just doesn't seem right...
Anyway, next he threw out, "Men find blonds very appealing, you know..."
I wasn't about to engage this guy and say something like, "Romeo, do you find me very appealing?" So instead I asked the next logical question that came to mind: "Is that because we're supposed to be stupid?"
That was the end of the conversation.