Thursday, February 11, 2010

Just in Time for Valentine's Day

There in the late, dark hours of the evening, Mr. Wonderful and I laid side-by-side, whispering to each other about something we’d never before discussed. My toilet.

It’s been misbehaving lately and rather than call my landlord and say, “Hey B, I keep clogging up the crapper—can you send someone over?” I wanted to snake it myself. But Mr. W informed me last night that my apartment likely has clay pipes and if I snake it, I could break a pipe and flood the place. I think I may just go buy some Liquid Plummer and call it a day (I know, I am the Green AntiChrist. It’s just that…when the shower stopped up, LP worked like a charm.)

When the toilet incidences first started, I thought it might be my fault.

I’ve been watching a lot of Dr. Oz lately and he talks about fiber constantly. So much so, that I became insecure about my own fiber consumption. Was I not getting enough? Was I slowly building an indestructible pebble wall inside my sewer line because of the lack of roughage in my diet? Was I going to end up on the show as a worst-case scenario pooper?

I’m not sure if I expressed these concerns to Mr. W, but as we did with the Napa/Birthday idea, we had a brain-sharing moment about all this over the weekend. Thinking I could solve my plumbing issues by way of the bowel, I picked up some Benefiber at Target Friday. Then Saturday when I went over to his house, there on my nightstand was a container of Benefiber.

I laughed and asked him what that little gift was all about. “You said you didn’t think you were getting enough fiber, so I picked up a bottle for each of us.”

That’s the kind of thoughtful guy Mr. W is. The kind who cares about me and my colon. And my clay pipes.

14 comments:

Mr. W said...

Nice, now the world will know of the problem with the plumbing. Yours and the apartment's.

Mel Heth said...

Love, You know me and my sphincter are both open books.

Dingo said...

You know me and my sphincter are both open books

TMI!! Does this mean what I think it means? TMI!!

Mel Heth said...

Dingo - Hahahaha oh simmer down! Just a joke to get a rise out of Mr. W.

laura said...

Nice!!! Considering my own Mr. W had a meltdown in the baking section at the grocery store looking for baker's sugar and placed a frantic phone call to me, I am pretty sure he wouldn't even know where to find Benefiber. 2 thums up for Mr. W.

Danielle said...

This has been on my mind latley too. I have to have my first colonoscopy next week. I guess the bright side is that I will be all clean. :) Not excited though.

geekhiker said...

I'm with Dingo. I think some sort of line may have been crossed!!!

Anonymous said...

Oh, Mr. W, I love you - you are the best.....you can take care of my daughter's plumbing anytime!

Mr. W said...

Amomymous,
I keep telling her to just call a plumber already.

Mel Heth said...

Laura - Mr. D W had a meltdown? Has he never had to buy sugar before?

Danielle - I hope you blog about that so we can all hear what it was like. :)

Geekhiker - Awe come on - it's not the first time I made a fart joke on here!

Mom - He takes care of your daughter's plumbing all the time, don't worry... How the heck else did you expect me to read that line?!!

Mr. W - Apparently my mom thinks the only plumber I should be calling is you. I think I saw that in a movie somewhere...

Dingo said...

Hahahahahaha! I know it was a fart joke! I just couldn't resist.

Mel Heth's mom, I knew she was talking about fart jokes. And Mel Heth's mom, I used to be a good kid. I don't know what went wrong. I blame the Internet.

Big Sister said...

I'm disturbed that mom is thanking Mr. W for taking care of your plumbing, and that you told us all about your open sphincter. That's just wrong. And you say he never reads this blog? Maybe you should flush a dose of Benefiber down the toilet for good measure and do some Kegels to tighted your muscles.

Sizzle said...

I think this just makes you a more adorable couple. :-)

blakspring said...

nothing says love like mutual constipation :)