Wednesday, August 13, 2008

A Whole New Level of Romance

I have to thank Mandy for expanding my vocabulary last week with a term I found so absolutely hilarious, I had to pass it on to Mr. W. Mandy is brilliant and should be in charge of writing Merriam-Webster’s next Collegiate Dictionary. I know, you’re wondering what the term was… Well, read below and I’m sure it’ll jump right out at you.

Somewhere between Saturday and Monday I caught a little stomach bug. Mr. W and I saw an awful U2 cover band (broke my heart, seriously) at House of Blues on Saturday night and then went down to Newport and rollerbladed along the beach Sunday. He made a fantastic dinner and I fell asleep on the couch—from what I thought was post-rollerblading exhaustion. Turns out the exhaustion lasted right into Monday and was accompanied by body aches. Then my stomach got all topsy-turvy and I realized I was probably dying of e coli or arsenic poisoning.

Or maybe I just had a little touch of the flu.

Anyway, by last night, I’d had enough. I was uncomfortable on the inside and outside and I was whimpering my woes to Mr. W over IM.

His response: “Why don’t you go to CVS and get some Imodium for your tummy and some baby wipes for your no-no hole?”

I wiped a tear of pride from my eye, realizing that his continual exposure to my obnxiousness is paying off, and today I love him more than ever.

18 comments:

Anonymous said...

SICK. but i will definitely be adding it to my vocabulary. And very proud of Mr. W for shoehorning it into an IM message about you not feeling well... :) very creative.

Anonymous said...

I will incorporate "no-no hole" in my lesson for tomorrow night's class. Just because it's funny.

Anonymous said...

Sounds like a wee bit of food poisoning. Hope you feel better soon!

Nilsa S. said...

No-No Hole? Hilarious! And given my fiance's enjoyment of farting, I'll have plenty of opportunity to use it myself. :-)

Mandy_Fish said...

Once you call it "No-No" you know you wanna.

(I'm delighted to perverse the universe with my song.)

Anonymous said...

I have to say at least Mr. W acknowledges that it is a "no-no hole"!! I hope I didn't gross you out - LOL

Bretthead said...

Most people can only dream about regularly being associated with the 'no no hole'. Congrats to Mandy.

Was the bad cover band called Under a Blood Red Sky? Saw them in Denver and they SUUUUUUUUCKED! I almost threw up.

Mandy_Fish said...

@Wow: It's perfectly appropriate that I'm associated with the No-No Hole. It's naughty and you're embarrassed you like it so much.

*Thrusts hips*

Jenn Martinson said...

I. Have. No. Words. Part of me was like "ooh, how sweet of him" and then the other part of me was like "oh, if his buddies only knew...."

Lara Watkins said...

AWESOME! As I'm always looking for new words to describe my favorite function the parts related to that function, I will incorporate this term into my daily vocabulary :) Thanks Mandy!

Melissa Maris said...

Laura - I'm chiseling away at him. He'll be talking poop at the dinner table any day now...

Dingo - Please do! And please write a post on it! We could start a no-no hole pay-it-forward posting cycle.

Geekhiker - Thank you! I actually think it was a little flu bug. But thankfully I'm feeling much better today.

Nilsa - Awe, Sweets is a fartbag? That makes me love him a little more. :P

Mandy - Perverse away, please! There's always room for more.

Poopypants - Hahaha! Yeah, there'll be no Yes-Yessing!

Wow TWA - YES it was Under a Blood Red Sky!!! I'm so happy someone understands my pain! It was awful because the guitarists and the drummer sounded great, but the singer was just SUCH a tool!

Coconut Diaries - Hahaha I think he mainly did it to get a laugh out of me. But you're right - his buddies would never let him live it down.

Lara - I KNEW you would love this. Feel free to use it when you see him in person next.

Anonymous said...

when you guys are comfortable enough to use bathroom speak around each other - you know he's in it for the long haul... too funny!

megabrooke said...

haha, i love it!

Michael C said...

I can assure you that by the time I end my day tonight (or something like that), I will have used 'no-no' hole at least 3 times.

Anonymous said...

I can tell Mr. W wasn't raised in a household like ours!

Bretthead said...

@mel: Yah the music wasn't bad at all, especially if you closed your eyes. But looking at them was bad and the singer was absolutely horrible. I have no idea how these guys get gigs. They are killing U2.

@mandy: If I had a buck for every time you were thrusting your hips all over Detroit, I could hire the sucky U2 Cover Band to play a song about your no no hole.

Melissa Maris said...

Charlotte - Haha I hope so! :)

Brookem - Me, too. He's very entertaining. :P

Michael C - You can ASSure me?

Mom - No, but I think I'm slowly converting him to be obnoxious like we are...

Wow TWA - I think you just made my bladder leak with your comment to Mandy. You are a comic genius.

Anonymous said...

What in the hell is a no-no hole?