Thursday, November 13, 2008

Starting Off Year Two

For those of you wondering, Mr. W and I had a really nice anniversary night. We enjoyed a lovely bottle of Shiraz, and dined on prosciutto-wrapped dates, caprese salad, more prosciutto with some cheese and bread, and yet another plate of 3 different cheese varieties with bread. It was so delicious I went into goldfish mode and ate until my stomach almost exploded and I died. Mr. W and cheese are my two favorite things in life.

Afterwards, we went back to his place, changed into our footie pajamas, climbed into our separate bunkbeds, read books to each other and fell asleep with chocolate chip cookies in our mouths. That’s exactly the way it happened, Mom.

Tomorrow we leave for St. Louis.

Yep, it’s the big meeting-of-the-family weekend. I’m taking gifts for all the female relatives and have been trying my best to muster up some adorable pheromones to emit in their presence so they all love me. Keep your fingers crossed.

Mr. W has given me a long list of things I can’t talk about to the fam, including politics, online dating, farts, religion, sex, global warming, mammogram helmets, blogging and poop. I’m also not supposed to call it “Missoura.”

Apparently his grandma, who is Greek, doesn’t speak English all that well, which leads me to think it could be a little bit funny to say things like, “Yaya, did you know that the first time Mr. W told me he loved me it was because I said I’d put his balls in my mouth?”

He didn’t find this as funny as I did.

Worst-case scenario, I’ll go there and accidentally start talking about hugging trees and raising taxes, and how I met Mr. W online and I don’t go to church. Then I’ll accidentally clog the toilet. Best-case, I’ll be able to uphold the fa├žade of manners and charm and they’ll send us home with some sort of male dowry and a family-wide blessing.

I’ll let you know how it goes.

13 comments:

laura said...

So what is left to talk about???? Looks liek Mr. W and family are
in for an entire weekend of you not talking. Have fun!!

Jane Monepenny said...

Happy Anniversary! =)

Definitely DO NOT call it Missoura. As for being super polite, you'll find that after awhile when they get to know you, Missourians are pretty laid back. =) Have fun in my former home! I miss it a lot.

Nilsa said...

Yay for the anniversary! Congrats! And you'll do just fine for the family meet-n-greet. I have no doubt. If not, drive yourself to the Budweiser plant, get yourself a tour and start drinking. Heavily. =)

The Coconut Diaries said...

You'll be fabulous (but I'll secretly be crossing my fingers that your digestive system behaves itself)

Mel Heth said...

Laura - Right? I know! It's going to be such a departure from regular family gatherings and my everyday conversation topics. I guess I'll just have to talk about the weather a lot.

Jane - Thanks. :) I won't call it Missoura. I just love saying that because it makes Mr. W shake his head at me. I'll have to give you a highlight reel when I get back - I wonder if we'll hit any of your old haunts!

Nilsa - I hope you're right. :) Sadly I don't like Bud. I asked Mr. W if it was okay for me to drink Corona there and he said that would be acceptable - they wouldn't evict me from the state for being a Califonrian.

Coconut Diaries - Yes, please do. You never know what nerves will do to my stomach. We wouldn't want another prom night incident.

justrun said...

You will be fabulous!

P.S. Bring Immodium. :)

Wow, that was awkward said...

Wear a Cubs hat and tell them the Cardinals stink.

jen tarara said...

You will do great. Enjoy observing life in the midwest and be sure to go up in the arch. Hope you have a coat - it's snowy east of LA...

Anita said...

LOVE IT! Good luck (not that you need it) and have fun not talking in Missoura. ;)

brookem said...

ahh! hope the meet-the-parents goes swimmingly!

brookem said...

and happy anniversary!!!!

Semicharmed said...

happy anniversary! geez....I'm with Laura - what else is there to talk about? Yaya sounds like she's gonna be fun! You'll have a great time, and I have a feeling you'll be a hit with his fam!

Big Sister said...

I liked the part on your anniversary night about falling asleep with cookies in your mouth. Welcome to what my anniversary looks like...Can't wait to hear all the stories about Missoura!